The Connection Craft By Petra

Tag: mental-health

  • Depth over Destination 

    Depth over Destination 

    hey you x

    this is a quickie about how to start conversation 🙂

    Sales has been part of my life for as long as I can remember. I’ve worked in it for years, and while I was pretty good at it, I wasn’t always focused on closing. Sometimes I’d go completely off track and end up in long conversations, make a friend, or just leave someone with a dinner recommendation. At the time, it probably looked like I wasn’t doing my job.

    But looking back, those moments gave me something more valuable than a sale.Some of those conversations even led to internships later on. Others just stayed what they were: brief, genuine interactions. Either way, they stuck with me.

    One of my favorite jobs was at a small store on a pier by the beach. It was competitive, fast-paced, and a little chaotic, so we called ourselves “the sharks.”

    The goal was simple: find a customer, adapt quickly, build trust, and close. We used to joke about it as hook, line, sinker.

    At the time, it just felt like a game, an easy way to make money and meet people. But it ended up teaching me something much bigger.It taught me how to hold a conversation with anyone. Not just by following a script, but by paying attention, adjusting in real time, and understanding that where you are and how you show up matters.

    Sometimes, yeah, you’re just trying to hit your numbers. But sometimes, you walk away with something better.

    And dont get me wrong i was I was good at it too I could hit numbers, outperform other shops, do everything the job asked.

    But the moments I remember most weren’t the sales. One time, I sold to a group in the store, and somehow it turned into us all going jet skiing later that day.
    We still follow each other now, and one of them actually owns a miniature action figure company.

    Definitely not part of the sales script. But moments like that happen when you stop treating every interaction like a transaction.

    If you want to get better at that whether it leads to a sale or something completely random here are a few things that actually help..

    1. If you want to talk to someone but don’t know where to start, ask yourself what caught your attention. Was it their style, what they’re doing, or something about their energy. Start there. It makes the conversation feel honest.
    2. Read the room and be genuine.
      People can tell when you’re forcing it. Pay attention to how they respond and adjust. If they seem open, lean in. If not, ease up.
    3. People trust those who are actually present. When someone feels like you’re really listening, the conversation naturally goes further. Be affirming.

    Love P

  • Your Next Level Lives on the Other Side of Doubling Down.

    Your Next Level Lives on the Other Side of Doubling Down.

    Sometimes you just gotta say fuck it and double down. I did not invent that wisdom. It was passed down to me (shoutout Zach Duran CSP). But once I actually started living it, my life leveled up in ways I did not expect.

    Here is the truth: double down or drown. When you are struggling, whether it is in friendships, work, or anything else, it is not about half-stepping. It is about going all in. Do not cling to what drains you. Drop what does not serve you. But if you love something, if it is worth it, grow for it.

    Doubling down means doing the unglamorous stuff. The stuff that sucks. It is giving more effort than you ever have before and pushing yourself right to the edge of your ability. At first it feels like you are doing the most or like you are trying too hard. But here is the secret. The person who “does the most” is usually the person who does the best. And when you act like that person, you start to become that person.

    At work, that might mean making more calls than you have ever made. Tackling the stuff you usually avoid, just to see what your true maximum looks like. Every single time I have hit a plateau and chosen to double down, I have unlocked things I did not even know I was capable of.

    Here is the trick. Set a time frame. Do not think of it as changing your whole identity overnight. Think of it as an experiment. Give yourself two weeks, thirty days, ninety days. Go all in for that period. The wild part is that by the time it is over, it will not feel like a temporary push. It will feel like the most familiar version of you.

    LOVE, P

    (The picture for this post is my first time writing my idea for this website in the UA library)

  • Mascara in My Macchiato

    Mascara in My Macchiato

    Being a twenty-something girl means juggling heartbreaks, Googling the best retinol serums because apparently the minute you turn 21 you’re practically 30, falling in love, moving into new places, and adulting for real. It’s taxes (shoutout TurboTax), it’s figuring out boob tape, it’s change after change after change. And sometimes, it smacks you right in the face.

    Last week, for example…

    My boyfriend and I had just moved into our new apartment. It’s beautiful, but the carpets were fugly (like, aggressively ugly) and the place reeked of dog pee thanks to the previous tenants. Thankfully we got it fixed, but that day everything felt like too much. I got my period, my plans got cancelled, I realized I’d completely forgotten about an appointment with someone I really admire, and to top it off, my bra wire was stabbing me in the ribs like it had a personal vendetta.

    I was livid. My boyfriend—bless him—tried to make me laugh, but in the moment it landed more like ragebait than comfort. Cue the waterworks. I was overstimulated, cranky, and melting in 115-degree Arizona heat.

    So I did the only thing I could think of: I walked to a café in my new neighborhood to clear my head. I’d set the scene for you—but honestly, I think a picture says it better. Let’s just say it involves me, tears, and an extremely ironic inspirational quote on the wall.

    After that meltdown, I realized something: I’d been sprinting through everything like my new apartment, new job, new routines, still trying to work out and hit my steps like my Apple Activity Ring was my boss—without giving myself a second to breathe. No wonder the tiniest thing (demon bra wire) felt like the final straw.

    So I did something absolutely radical for me: I slowed down. Instead of obsessing over the carpets or spiraling about the appointment I missed, I let myself just exist. Revolutionary, I know. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in being “productive” or “successful” that we forget it’s perfectly fine to sit on the couch and meditate (stare at the wall for 10 minutes) .

    Here’s what I’m learning: slowing down doesn’t mean you’re giving up or falling behind. It means giving yourself space to actually live the moment instead of sprinting through it like it’s the last mile of a 5k. And when you do pause, you start to realize that half the stuff stressing you out is just…life being life—or, if you squint, little opportunities dressed up as chaos.

    So if you’re in your twenties (or honestly, any stage of life) and feel like everything’s crashing down at once, here are three small ways I’ve been practicing slowing down (that don’t involve crying in a café… though I still recommend it):

    1. Give yourself space from your feelings
     Sometimes the best thing you can do is step away from your own head for a minute. Personally, I like to distract my mind—play a game, read something, scroll through a random rabbit hole—anything that literally redirects my thoughts. It’s not about avoiding your feelings forever, it’s about giving your body a chance to regulate so you don’t spiral. Do this for a few minutes until you feel steady enough to come back and actually face what’s going on.

    2. Give a girl some grace
     You can’t create lasting change when your motivation comes from punishment. It has to come from love. When you restrict, you’re basically setting yourself up for the same bounce-back cycle (which is why most diets fail). Instead, try building habits around your weaknesses instead of beating yourself up over them. You don’t need to be sunshine-and-rainbows all the time, but reframing even one negative thought makes a huge difference over time. Do that enough, and you’ll literally rewire your brain.

    3. Take a nap

    Ole reliable. Sometimes you just need to hit the reset button. A nap gives your brain and body a break so you wake up calmer—or if you’re lucky, even happier. Bonus: fewer emotionally-charged conversations with yourself when you’re rested.

    LOVE , P

  • Dear Diary, Today i posted fanfics (sorry dad)

    Dear Diary, Today i posted fanfics (sorry dad)

    hey gals,

    this one’s a little different. the regular friday post is still coming, but think of this as a bonus.

    i’ve been pushing myself out of my comfort zone a lot lately and honestly? it’s kinda draining. i’m really proud of what i’ve done, but i also feel… weirdly naked.

    the best way i can explain it is being 13 at a public pool in a tankini shivering while you’re looking for your goggles and the cute lifeguard is right there. or like when your nipples get hard in the middle of a class presentation and someone says “must be cold” (ptsd). it’s not your fault no one should make it weird but it’s still so awkward. that’s exactly what this feels like.

    i keep reminding myself why i’m doing this why it’s worth it and that i actually am likable. because posting something online where people can really read it? terrifying. i can’t hide behind my wattpad handle anymore. it’s like publicly admitting i wrote those raunchy fanfictions.

    (sorry dad. everyone knows now that you sold me to one direction. iykyk)

    the words that follow are personal but maybe they’ll resonate with someone or at least remind you to see the good in yourself too.

    Reflection:

    i’m kind of all over the place which honestly feels like my superpower. i can cosplay fratboy like nobody’s business rocking that laid back slightly goofy energy that somehow just works. but don’t be fooled i’m also the girl who devours corny romance novels with a giant smile and every now and then i dive into a mind bending thriller or a total mind fuck just to keep things spicy.

    balance is important to me so i make sure to sneak in a good self help book here and there (totally join my book club if that sounds like your vibe lol).

    i’m serious about the gym but my discipline in other areas does not always line up and i’m building new habits to fix that. i can admit i’ve been getting better but let’s be real we were not winning before.

    and even though i am the biggest self love cheerleader comparison hits me like a bus filled with cement pretty frequently. so i’m using this platform to help me with that because it forces me to get real raw and vulnerable. people are different and that is okay.

    Sometimes i feel like social media has this sneaky way of making you want stuff you never even wanted in the first place.

    so yeah this is me awkward all over the place trying to figure it out one day at a time. Its exhausting but its so so worth it. and if you’re feeling the same way you’re not alone (literally text me). we don’t have to have it all together to be enough or to succeed.

    thanks for coming along on this hot mess express with me. let’s keep it real keep pushing and remember that the only person we really have to be better than is the person we were yesterday.

    catch you in the next post.

    love,
    p